Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Passage

One of my colleagues takes advantage of the color printer to regularly print out 8.5x11 photos of his son to display on the wall of his office. When I was TTC the first time and when I was pregnant, I would intentionally walk that way to the bathroom, even though it wasn't the most direct route, and frequently I would stop by and learn about his latest adventures in babyhood.

Said son is now almost ten months old, but in my mind he is still seven months old, as that was how old he was when it started being too painful to visit, or even to take that route to the bathroom. I wonder what milestones he has reached in that time. Or what anyone on that hall has been up to for the past few months.

4 comments:

Jen said...

Yeah, I know how you feel.

Kate said...

I found your blog today by way of a message board, and I can't tell you how comforting it is to know that someone out there is going/has gone through the same thing. I am carrying around a pregnancy that is no longer viable, and, today, my husband and I are charged with making a decision regarding surgery, medication, etc. I will continue to read your blog every day because, like you, my husband and I are not telling anyone about TTC or the miscarriage, and knowing that there is someone else who is dealing with this (and who is willing to share her stories) will make my days easier. Thank you!

Geohde said...

I find that I avoid quite good friends with babies these days because it hurts.

Especially when they know what happened and yet they lecture me on not trying too long with IVF etc. Screw them, they already HAVE a child so it's different.

J

K @ ourboxofrain said...

kate: not sure if you'll see this, but i am so sorry for what you are going through. it really sucks, especially when you don't have people irl to talk to about it. be sure to give yourself time to heal -- it took me a lot longer than i had expected to crawl out of the hole i felt like i fell in back in september. and feel free to email me if you want -- ourboxofrain at gmail dot com.